I recently had the pleasure of working with a family of a newborn who has a ten year old sister. This newborn is an incredibly intense baby who has the whole family a little undone. Long bouts of crying, very little sleep for mom and dad and general chaos reign in this once orderly home. During my visit, big sis calmly and expertly showed me how she soothes her new baby brother. I actually considered handing over my Fussy Baby Specialist badge to her!
As you can see from this picture, there were no ten year old siblings at my house when the newborns arrived. While this is a picture of two brothers, it is also a picture of two babies, one looking not too happy to have to share his babydom. I had some surprises as well when I discovered a playpen is not necessarily a safe place for a baby. The playpen was no match for the throwing arms of the older Huebner siblings. (No permanent damage done. Whew!)
It is a real challenge to care for a newborn, have quality time for older children, and promote love and caring between siblings. Parents, you must get creative with your time. Cuddle your newborn while watching a video with an older child. (for the 35th time) Put baby in a carrier while you do a puzzle with an older child. Arrange play dates for your older child. Ask a friend to watch the baby for an hour while you take an older child for ice cream. Instead of fretting about whether you are giving enough attention to all your children, be thankful for the real life opportunity to teach your children the real meaning of sharing.

I read somewhere that parenting is not for the faint of heart. The glow of pregnancy and wondrous anticipation of a new baby are in stark contrast to the realities of labor, delivery and caring for a newborn. Friends and relatives may tell you how tired you will be after baby arrives, how much your boobs will hurt, how much a baby cries, and how difficult and exhausting it will be to leave the house. However, before that baby arrives, it just sounds too unbelievable.
Parents must, well frankly, get some guts. No one will care for and love your child like you do. You are that child's number one advocate. You must be calm and brave during immunizations, high fevers, disagreements with day care providers and sleepless nights. You are the only one to convince the nurse on the other end of the phone that yes, your child DOES need to be seen by the doctor. And, you must work really hard to keep it together as you hold down your toddler so their face can be stitched after a run in with the kitchen counter.
Recently I flew over rough Alaskan terrain in a tiny airplane and a helicopter. For me, that took some guts. And even though I was told how tough it would be to send a child off to college, I had no idea how difficult and how much parental intestinal fortitude that would require. But watching four wonderful individuals find their strength and their stride has been more rewarding than I every could have imagined.